Piscina

I travel with work......a lot. This can sometimes make training a little tricky. Hotels advertise their services online as 'substantial, modern, fully equipped gym' and when you get there it's a 1970s second hand sit-up bench and a skipping rope next to a water cooler. And sometimes you don't get the water cooler. Or the sit-up bench.




The plus side of travel is that swim gear and running shoes pack pretty light and you get to run and swim in some amazing places off the beaten track. Unforgettable runs include a sunset jog along the beach at Mazagon; hilly plod through the seaside villages of Pallafrugel; the coastal pine forests of Follonica and the lava fields of Lanzarote. Lovely the lot.

But there are pitfalls in the cultural differences between nations. Us Brits are quite stand-offish and 'stiff upper lips' types and spectacularly heterosexual in our initial social interactions. Southern Europeans are not so picky. Last week I was in Barcelona on business and was spoilt for choice for pools to do my swim training Public Swimming Pools in Barcelona. Swim training is, by it's nature, a beautifully solitary experience. So imagine the scene. I had just done a hard, satisfying 1350 metre interval swim replete with warm up, drills, hard sets and a cool down. I emerged from the pool feeling pumped and tired. Replete in my budgie smugglers but a pool length and a half away from the showers. An old man in pool thongs, faded shorts and a logo-festooned polo shirt walks next to me. Let's call him Pablo

He engages me in conversation in garrulous Spanish.
Me: No abla Espanol. Pardon
Pablo: Ahhhh English you are long. I like (looking down at my budgie smugglers)
Me: Ermmmmm
Pablo (slapping me on my wet, bare back but leaving his hand there, lingering and stroking) Good
Me: Good what. Good god
Pablo: Long. I like
Me: (slightly speeding up on my, by now desperate, walk/jog to the changing rooms) Gracias
Pablo: (as he keeps following me to the changing rooms) I help you stroke long.
Me: No thanks
Pablo: You come mañana and we stroke long and strong
Me: OK (as I run for the changing rooms)